PART 3: The Importance of No!

No, No, No, No, No

Have you ever felt the satisfaction of telling someone no? If not, it’s probably because you haven’t done it enough. There is power in NO! The power that no possesses comes from the power that you gain when you decline an offer in order to better serve yourself. This my friend, is called self-love.

Saying no is hard-at first. It is uncomfortable. When you first start saying no you are going to feel like an asshole. Don’t stop there! The more you do it, the more fulfilling it becomes. Don’t worry, I am about to make all of this make sense very soon! Check it out below-3 things that happen when you start saying no.

    Ever sit down at night and plan your entire day out? You wake up in the morning ready to take over the world! Coffee is hot, laptop is charged, the house is empty-you are ready to work! Then, you get a phone call. Someone needs something. You think to yourself, “well, I was just planning on staying in the house all day and doing a few things…I guess I can help Susan out”. You end up rearranging this perfectly planned day, all because Susan needs your help with something.What happens now is that your small tasks end up becoming urgent tasks because you put them off for someone else’s needs. I’m sure you can see where I’m going with this. Telling Susan no would have allowed you to complete the tasks you set out to complete for the day. Instead, you are now behind.No need to beat a dead horse. The BLUF (bottom line up front) is, when you start telling people no you have more time to take care of the things that matter to you. Even if your only plan for the day was to lay across your bed and binge watch RHOA-you are still entitled to tell Susan no.More importantly, no does not need to discriminate. Friends, FAMILY (yes family), co-workers, YOUR BOSS, are also possible recipients of a big fat NO from time to time. Now of course, there are exceptions to this rule. As an actor, I often times have to drop what I am doing to go to a last minute audition. Of course, I would not say no to this. The audition is still serving me. What I am referring to is saying no to people who want you to sacrifice your plans to completely serve them.Don’t be like me and take years to learn this lesson. Take control of your life and productivity and start telling busters no, left and right!


    Alright, back to Susan’s needy ass. Susan is a good friend and great to be around. However, it is important to keep in mind that these characteristics do not make her exempt from receiving a no.By telling Susan no, and choosing to take care of you-you become more of an asset to the relationship. When you put everyone else’s needs before your own, it puts you in a position where you begin to resent those you are close to. You begin to possess disdain for them because you chose not to look after yourself. Don’t be that person. What happens is you’ll continue to put Susan first and the next thing you know, you’re mad at Susan for consuming all of your time. But who allowed Susan to do that? You did! Then, you’ll start mistreating Susan because of something you allowed her to do. Preserve you relationships. I promise you, your real friends will understand you telling them no from time to time.


    This is perhaps the most important one of the 3. When you actively dedicate more time to yourself, and start telling others no, you accelerate your growth. When your growth is accelerated, you become more successful and find yourself constantly accomplishing the goals you set. Who would not begin to see their worth when the fruits of their labor start to surface?Don’t act like you don’t understand. You know that feeling when you finally accomplish something. Can’t nobody tell you nothing! Now imagine feeling that way 24/7. You can if you start to dedicate more time to yourself.Most people are successful not because they are naturally talented but because they constantly and consistently dedicate time to themselves and their goals.

We have eliminated people from our lives that do not serve our purpose or goals.
We are consistently spending time in solitude.
Now, I challenge you to plan your days out. Be proactive in the things you decide to do and how you spend your time. Once you have done this, have the self-discipline to stick to your plans and tell others no when they try to interfere with them.

Shoot me an email or hit me up on IG and let me know how this information is impacting your life. Looking forward to hearing from you all!